Ouch, that does sound majorly nasty. Not only did you lose your Dad, but almost all your relatives on his side of the family at the same time. ;-(

I do have reason to believe that my Dad can change his behavior. He used to date the sweetest woman in the world. Her name if Fran. Both my sister and I wish they were still together because he was better while they were together. She basically told him when he was out of line and in such a way that he could accept it.

Since I need to learn to set boundaries, now I get to see if he'll react as well when I'm pointing it out.