I'm impressed with how much you can do the self insight thing. So many people cannot and it seems you're... easy with it, rather than finding it a painful thing. That's so great.
Much of what you say here I empathise with. Setting boundaries with family, for example. Being excited and high-spirited about certain topics which my family Do Not Want in quite an emphatic way. I find myself nodding along much of this.
It's okay to feel "better". It's okay to feel "oh thank the gods I'm not in that place anymore, it was a horrible place". (it's okay, though not helpful, to get dragged into the same old arguments; setting boundaries doesn't mean you can always stick to them, especially around intense family time. Sometimes you can't. "I'm not having arguments with you" is a very difficult boundary to maintain.)(frexample, an interaction I had with my sister wherein I was trying to maintain "if I can't say this nicely I won't", but then exploded because you know what, fuck that shit and I'm not gonna sit in silence over that kind of bull. So that didn't end that well, which is evident by the fact I remember it. But since then I have not had one argument with her about, you know, basic human rights and decent politics, so go me?)
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Date: 2016-06-22 12:43 pm (UTC)I'm impressed with how much you can do the self insight thing. So many people cannot and it seems you're... easy with it, rather than finding it a painful thing. That's so great.
Much of what you say here I empathise with. Setting boundaries with family, for example. Being excited and high-spirited about certain topics which my family Do Not Want in quite an emphatic way. I find myself nodding along much of this.
It's okay to feel "better". It's okay to feel "oh thank the gods I'm not in that place anymore, it was a horrible place". (it's okay, though not helpful, to get dragged into the same old arguments; setting boundaries doesn't mean you can always stick to them, especially around intense family time. Sometimes you can't. "I'm not having arguments with you" is a very difficult boundary to maintain.)(frexample, an interaction I had with my sister wherein I was trying to maintain "if I can't say this nicely I won't", but then exploded because you know what, fuck that shit and I'm not gonna sit in silence over that kind of bull. So that didn't end that well, which is evident by the fact I remember it. But since then I have not had one argument with her about, you know, basic human rights and decent politics, so go me?)