rant, ignore if you want

[dragonyphoenix]

Oh my Goddess! My roommate is driving me nuts!

The dryer broke and I tried looking at it myself but had trouble getting it open. So I said I'd as Dad to look at it while he's here (Thanksgiving) because he used to own two laundromats and fixed his own machines. It wasn't the belt which meant it wasn't going to be an easy fix so I ordered a new machine. It came in on Friday BUT the specs for dryer outlets have changed. The plug on the new dryer doesn't fit into the old outlet. So still no dryer.

Like Isabella in Northanger Abbey, Leslie, if she's upset about something, will say it's fine but make a bunch of comments on the topic. So, she told me she was okay drying her clothes at the local laundromat. But, the weekend before Dad visited, after I'd told her we were going to look at it while he was here, she talked about having to take her laundry out FIVE times over the course of one evening and the next morning. Nothing blatantly accusatory, more like “I've got to find my card for the laundromat.”

So last night she commented that she'd have to take the laundry out. I spent the day running errands. I really did have that much to do but I was also glad to be out of the house until dark because I wouldn't be here when she made a big deal about carting the laundry in or out. So, I'm sitting and taking my shoes off when she comments that she'd been lazy today, hadn't done anything, “oh, no, that's not true, I did my laundry.” Aaaagh!

Even if I had thought through all the things that might go wrong with the delivery, that the plug wouldn't have fit the outlet would never had been on my list. Why can't she just give me some fucking time to deal with this? I've already found out that while it's possible to use an older plug, it'd be a better idea to update the outlet. And I've started searching for the name of the electrician I like. I just haven't found it yet. And if I don't find it I'll ask neighbors for references and look at the BBB. It feels like she expects me to wave a goddamned magic wand and fix it right now. Aaargh!

And I get that part of the reason I'm so edgy about this is that I feel I should have been perfect and that I should have anticipated and had a fix ready for the problem. And I get the holidays are frustrating for me and making me grumpier than usual. And I get I'm projecting my anger that Megan is dead. And I get that I could (should?) just explain to her how I hear what she's saying.

I want to add “but still! Aaaargh!” but I feel dumb saying that after the whole having other reasons to be angry and haven't asked her not to explanation.

*sigh*

Comments

[velvetwhip.livejournal.com]

I am sorry, but I see NO need for you to be subjected to her passive-aggressive crap! You're human, guess what, and stuff happens! Everyone in the universe has bought something that turned out to be not quite right and you are doing everything you can to rectify it. She's a bitch!


Gabrielle

[dragonyphoenix.livejournal.com]

Oops, I left out the part where she might not be passive-aggressive. Sorry about that. If something's bothering her, she talks about it a lot.

If someone in my family (i.e. my mother) were doing this, it'd definitely be passive-aggressive. That's why I tend to hear it that way. With Leslie I'm not sure if it's p-a or if she's just bringing it up because it's bugging her. Part of the frustration may be that I don't know if it's p-a or not.

Thank you for seeing my side of it.

[velvetwhip.livejournal.com]

If she's not making it clear and not allowing you the chance to talk things out with her? Then it's passive-aggressive and I stand by my characterization. She needs to get over it. There's this thing called a clothesline if she's so sick of going to to the laundromat and she can't be patient for a few days.


Gabrielle

[dragonyphoenix.livejournal.com]

Well, I could make my position clear but I'm not. But she definitely does say "yes, I'm fine going to the laundromat" and then keeps bringing it up. Okay, I guess she is being passive-aggressive. I could be more forthright myself but it's less likely in this massively stressful - at least for me - time of the year.

Thanks, I feel not that getting upset with her is a reasonable response.

[protoneoromanic.livejournal.com]

She is being a bit of bitch, but not confronting her about it is still probably the best way to have a safe and tolerable Holiday Season. If she's this way about everything though... at some point I might start looking for a different roommate. I take it that this is your house and she is renting from you? If not, she is an even bigger bitch because this should be as much her problem to fix as yours.

[dragonyphoenix.livejournal.com]

It is my house but she's the one who cares whether or not we have a dryer. I'm perfectly happy to line dry myself. On the plus side, she has offered to pay half so she can be generous.

We actually get along better than I'd thought we would. She's extroverted and I'm introverted so I thought she'd be in my space all the time but she's shown herself to be considerate about my personal space. She's sort of Felix Unger-like and can get anxious if things are out of sorts.

I'm not going to bring it up over the holidays because they provide their own stressors, but I'm sure I'll have another opportunity to confront her.